When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay.
Own half the world's perfume industry and still never use deodorant.
You get to eat insect food like snails and frog's legs.
If there's a war you can surrender really early.
You don't have to read the subtitles on late night films on Channel 4.
You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries.
You can be ugly and still become a famous film star.
Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride.
You don't have to bother with toilets, just shit in the street.
People think you're a great lover even when you're not.

You can have a woman president without electing her.
You can spell colour wrong and get away with it.
You can call Budweiser beer.
You can be a crook/adulterer and still be president.
If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
If you can breathe you can get a gun.
You can invent a new public holiday every year.
You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy".
You can think you're the greatest nation on earth when you're not at all.

Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah.
Warm beer.
You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket.
You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events.
Union jack underpants.
Water shortages guaranteed every single summer.
You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
Bathing once a week-whether you need to or not.
Ditto changing underwear.
Beats being Welsh.

It beats being an American.
Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
You can play hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins.
Own-an-eskimo scheme.
Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.

Top 10 Reasons You know you are a Bulgarian:
1. You don't want to have or do any business with Bulgarians.
2. You started to drink at the age of 12.
3. Your grandma and grandpa live in your basement.
4. Your parents have a shot of rakiya for breakfast.
5. You live with your mom and dad until you are married.
6. Your mom tells you not to sit on cement or your ovaries will freeze.
7. When you can always smell garlic on your parents breath and they insist that it kills bacteria.
8. Your 15 year old sister can out-drink any American.
9. Your father calls you a dummy for not knowing how to do something he can't do either.
10. You are 18 years old but your parents still call you by your sibling's or pet's name.


The ideal Me


As homework the last two times in my English class I had to write essays on the subjects “Why should I buy a Mercedes” and “I’m a participant in VIP Dance”. Truly I didn’t have any desire to write on those subjects and I postponed it. Accidentally I found a list with 1000 writing ideas in the world wide web. I picked up the writing idea under number 298 – The ideal Me. I really hope my teacher won’t be angry about this change of the topic.

As most people I have an understanding and an illusion about my real and my ideal Me. The real Me is what I am and the ideal Me is what I wish to be. These both pictures don’t vary too much between. The “ideal Me” is just a perfect version of the “real Me”.

The “ideal Me” would have more time for family and friends. I want to spend more time with my family. Now I visit my family 5-6 times during the year because we live in different cities. As a better friend I should listen carefully and give valuable advices to my friends. It is impossible to be a better friend just by trying. A friendship connection just happens and you feel it this way, it’s not just a trial or hard work. But in cases we already have beautiful friendships, we have to try and keep them alive and colored.

The “Ideal Me” will find more time for me – I wish I had enough time to spend it at the gym and work out. I want to be fit and healthy. I want to watch out and choose correctly what, how and when to eat.

My “Ideal Me” should clean up often. In my dreams I would live in a dustfree home. At this point in my life I clean my house about 1-2 times every week. I always clean with that unpleasant feeling as I’m doing painful tasks. Cleaning, washing and ironing are tasks I vastly hate but unfortunatelly I could’t leave them to someone else. So, that’s why my ideal Me would have fun while cleaning, washing and ironing.

As a person I have positive and negative qualities. Of course I concentrate more on what I don’t have instead of enhancing what I possess. My ideal picture of Me should be more assertive and successful, less shy and humble. I wish I could be stronger to withstand to seductions, some temptations and challenges in everyday life. I wanna be more sociable and patient.

My real Me has sometimes good days, has sometimes bad days. I am smiling or sad, nervous or relaxed. In my ideal concept I would have more fun and would laugh more often. The ideal Me would be more happy.
But if I am happy every day in my life, how could I define what happiness is?

Woman's Prayer

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep.
One who is handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks.
When he says he'll call, he won't wait weeks.
I pray that he is gainfully employed.
When I spend his cash, he won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door.
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, and knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And never ever attempt to hit on my friend.

A Man's Prayer

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge breasts who owns a liquor store and a boat.


One day an employee sends a letter to her boss asking for an increase in her salary!!!

Dear Bo$$,

In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$ $incerely,

The next day, the employee received this letter of reply:

Dear Emplyee

I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed.

You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet.

NOw the newspaper are saying the world's leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United State s may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.

I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.

My love life is a big mess!
An ex-boyfriend called me yesterday again. We were 2 years ago for a couple of months together, we actually never break up. I just stopped meeting him - there were no specific reasons; I just lost sexual attraction toward him. He is a good boy – patient, well-balanced, he’s got big biceps ;) I have no explanation why I don’t want him back in my life!?!

Few weeks ago I visited a concert of Madonna in the city where I live. There I met a guy who was holding binoculars. Haha :-) Somehow I had a very free behaviour with him and often looked the scene through the binoculars. At the end of the concert we exchanged our phone numbers. I was so excited about the show that I couldn’t remember his name… He called me on the next day to arrange a meeting. Since I was packing my cloths for my summer vacation in Turkey I had no time to meet him. I promised to call him in one week, but actually I called him 10 days later.

I hardly tried to remember his name but unfortunatelly I couldn’t. So that’s why I entered his name in my phone as “Madonna” hahhaha :LOL So yesterday I called “Madonna” and we spoke. Then he called me back and we arrange our first date!

I’m very confused with all my experience, all the things I know, felt, suffered, and desired. Last year I arrived at the conclusion I can not toy well with men /maybe I’m wrong/. I fell into deep thoughts about what I’m doing wrong, how I’m attracting men, what kind of men I’m attracting and other things like that. I meet new guys, have fun to speak with them but I really can not find a man to give him all my love. WHY?
I accidentally found the book “Catch Him and Keep Him” by Christian Carter. I’m still reading it… This morning I read the following paragraph (page 112 from the book)

“...You don’t need to express all your thoughts, feelings and ideas about a topic on the spot, especially if you’re feeling really emotional about the topic. Wait and be patient, and do it when the time is right. Don’t be in a hurry when you’re in tough situations with a man—patience is wisdom and it will help you get what you want...”

How to know when the time is right? How to identify players and guys they are ready to settle down? “To be patient” means for me “a need of time”… Why do men need time? What are they considering? How to know when and how to push the fire-button on a man? Do all the men have the same buttons?




Are you addicted to Twitter, facebook, chating and other social networks? Do you know how to express your feelings and opinions by 140 characters?
Here we describe the meanings of the most important abbreviations used in modern slang. But please – do NOT use slang in English test! :lol

thank you
1NAM One in a Million
2DA today
4OJ 4th of July
AA ask about
AAF as a friend
AAK asleep at the keyboard
AAM all about me
AFK away from keyboard
ASAP as soon as possible
ASL age, sex, location
b4 before
B4N bye for now
BFF best friend forever
BRB be right back
BSU bless you
BTW by the way
cuz/coz because
CYA See Ya
DC disconnected
DFK deep French kiss

EOM end of message
FB facebook
FF follow friday
FUCK Friends University of Central Kansas :lol
FYI for your information
GL get lost
gr8 great
HDU how dare you
HS High school / high speed
IFLML I fucking love my life
IMHO in my humble opinion
IMO in my opinion
ISO I’m still online
IT I think
IWY I want you
J4F just for fun
JK just kidding
KISS keep it short and simple
KUL cool
L8R later
LDOC last day of class
LMAO laughing my ass off
LMFAO laughing my fat ass off
LOL laughing out loud
LOVE loss of valuable energy
MILF mom I’d like to fuck
NGL not gonna lie
OMG Oh My God
OMV on my move
PML Pissing Myself Laughing
PPL people
ROFL Rolling On Floor Laughing
RT retweet
SOML story of my life
STMU shut your mouth up
T2YL talk to you later
thx thanks
TTYL talk to you later
TTYN talk to you never
u you
w8 wait
WTF what the fuck

Any other suggestions?

Awesome pictures!


Let’s face it girls!
We are tired to look thin ladies on ads all around us! All the same positions, all the same beauty, all the same products, all the same spots… Yes, we ladies – we are very beautiful and gentle, female models provoke the mass to buy female products but...
I’m tired of advertising! I do not want to buy something just because a smiling woman tells it’s good for my skin, the fragrance is fascinating and so on.
Modern ladies are independent and powerful. We earn enough money, we are free to make decisions, don’t need permissions, we have own prerogatives, we live in one new age where we are the pioneers!
Let’s dream for a second these hot men want to sell us products! Would you buy a shower gel, fragrance, bikini, swimsuits etc.?

#1 Do you need a wet lady telling you how good is the new shower gel... Noooo This guy tells more /my favorite indeed/

#2 You need a sun care lotion? This wet man is available 24/7 to smear it over your back!

#3 No doubt! This guy would sell me all the cleanup mops & brushes, cleanup materials, cleanup liquids with and without foam...

#4 Looking for new bed sheets? Can you tell NO to this sweet perfect little shy boy?

#5 Just scream DENIM and this one is already running behind you to sell jeans ;)


Einstein said that 98% of people in the world cannot solve the following puzzle. Take a pen & paper and try solving it! Here is the Einstein Quiz:
1. There are 5 houses in 5 different colors.
2. In each house lives a person with a different nationality.
3. These 5 owners drink a certain beverage, smoke a certain brand of cigar and keep a certain pet.
4. No owners have the same pet, smoke the same brand of cigar or drink the same drink.
5. Hints:
>>> The Brit lives in a red house.
>>> The Swede keeps dogs as pets.
>>> The Dane drinks tea.
>>> The green house is on the left of the white house.
>>> The green house owner drinks coffee.
>>> The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds.
>>> The owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill.
>>> The man living in the house right in the centre drinks milk.
>>> The Norwegian lives in the first house.
>>> The man who smokes Blend lives next to the one who keeps cats.
>>> The man who keeps horses lives next to the man who smokes Dunhill.
>>> The owner who smokes Blue Master drinks beer.
>>> The German smokes Prince.
>>> The Norwegian lives next to the blue house.
>>> The man who smokes Blend has a neighbor who drinks water.

Question: Can you determine WHO KEEPS FISH?


I searched the web to find opinions and advices how to deal with difficult coworkers. Probably most of you suffer under coworker’s behaviour, e.g. talking loud on telephone, nervous people, always displeased people, lazy people, very sexy co-workers, not effective people etc.
I came across to an article in wikihow “How to Deal with a Work Colleague Who Has Stinky Lunches”. (

How to respond when a colleague eats his stinky lunch on the desk?
In that article were given 10 advices to solve this problem, e.g.

- Send him an anonymous email. (no way! Better hack the boss’ pc and send him a mail from the boss mailbox telling him that his works stinks like his work)

- Play the allergy or vegetarian card. (hey, I’m not a famous actress)

- Bring a fan to your desk and switch it on in direction of the meal. (why not just blow)

- Light a strongly scented candle at your desk. (sure, that’s a fantastic advice! I could spray in the office room my Armani code to choke the idiot)

- Put essential oils on your wrists. (come off it! How long may it helps?)

- Consider finding a job where you can work alone(!?!?!?! Where? On the moon?)

Excuse me! Who gives those stupid advices?

In all of the above listed situations things will definitely go worst. When you have a problem to solve and you choose methods to gloss over the problem, you terribly get into a deeper conflict with coworkers. In your office you have always to watch not to get into conflict, you have to carry to escape and avoid conflicts.

The main and important thing to do always is to lead a “simple conversation”. You should talk to this person, explain him or her how do you feel or what do you think about the situation. A solution to a problem may take one day or one year. Be patient!

Look around you! If you have a bad situation with a colleague probably the others co-workers had too. Let them know how you feel. You could build a colleague circle to speak together with the annoying co-worker.

Speaking with the boss is actually not a good idea. The manager is there to manage people & processes, not to solve misunderstandings between workers. In above situation you could complain to the boss in case your company does not have a dining-room.

So people, how do you deal with annoying co-workers?

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I'm often downloading pictures from for my desktop.
Sure I have favorite pictures ;) but I can not have all of them on my desktop so that's why I just want to share these pictures with you.

ENJOY them

and more more more :) :) :)